In the world of adoption there are two main things you focus on which are situations and matching. Just so you know what I am talking about in my posts I will explain both.
Situations- Are each baby that is up for adoption born or unborn.
Matching- In the adoption process the adoptive parents are given information such as the sex and race of the baby, the cost of the adoption (because all situations are different prices), and the medical history of the birth mom/family. In the medical history we are given as much information as she will tell. It also has her drug history during the pregnancy. After looking at the cost and medical information as a couple me and Stephen decide if it is a situation that we either want to present on or we do not. Presenting means that our adoption profile will be given to the birth mom so that she can choose who she wants her baby to go to. Our adoption profile is a lot of pictures of us, our family, our house, and our community, it also has different general information about us.
So far since we started this process we have been presented with two situations.
Situation 1- The first situation was presented us last week. Even though our consultant knew we probably would not present on this situation, she wanted us to make that call. The birth mom was due this week in Utah. It was an African American girl which is what we want and the price was perfect. But the medical history is not a situation that we were willing to take on. There was a long line of mental illness that ran in her family. It broke my heart that we had to turn this one down because I really liked what the Mom had to say in her interview questions.
Situation 2- The second situation was presented to us last Wednesday night. The birth mom had already delivered the baby in Louisiana on Monday. The baby was an African American girl which was perfect. The price of the adoption was a little more than we wanted to pay but the baby was healthy and the medical history looked good. Automatically Stephen and I decided to present on it. Our consultant told us that the birth Mom wanted a couple that is under 35 and wanted the family to have another adopted child. We knew from the beginning that we were not exactly what she wanted but she could always change her mind. She was suppose to get our profile on Thursday so we waited all day to hear something but we heard nothing. Then we were told on Thursday that she had the profiles but wanted to sleep on it. So we waited all day Friday on pins and needles to hear something. Later Friday our consultant called to let us know that the agency did not give her the profiles until late Friday after she signed the papers. Her choice was between three families. One of the other families we knew about but the other family we knew nothing about. The family we knew about was over 45 and had 6 kids. So pretty much it seemed like it was between us and the unknown couple. Finally at about three o'clock on Saturday afternoon we got the call that the birthmom had choosen the other couple. It turned out that the unknown couple was under 35 and had another African American adopted child. So they were exactly what the birthmom wanted.
Honestly as much as I wanted that baby we are ok that we didn't get her. First of all since it didn't work out then it was not meant to be our baby. Second I really wanted to meet the birthmom and I was sad that we had missed 6 days of the baby's life. I know that our little Elle is still out there. So right now we are just waiting on more situations :) Hopefully there will be some more this week. Until next time love and baby dust!
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